Tag Archives: Gorgeously Full Fat

Impassioned plea…

Gave-up-dieting

Hey gorgeous GFF subscribers, it’s been a long, long time.

That’s because the blog has moved, and for annoying techie reasons, you got left behind.

Bit I really miss you!

If you could take a couple of minutes and pop on over to the new blog at Gorgeously Full Fat  and just pop your email in the box on the top left hand corner, you’ll get your updates back, I’ll get my subscribers back, and I’ll be inspired to make lots more posts because I know there’s someone out there actually reading this stuff!

Thanks gorgeous people. I’ll male it worth your while, promise!

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Sneak preview of Viva Voluptuous…

VV cover

 

Viva Voluptuous is out on Friday….and as a special treat, just for blog readers, here’s a sneak preview of the first chapter….

“Ell, I have to be honest, I really don’t want to come to Dublin with you. You’re a lovely girl and I would love to have met you when I was younger as I think we could of had a lot of fun. After what happened with Rachel, I just don’t think I’m ready for a proper relationship with you. I hope we can still be friends. Sorry. Mark xx”

My breath caught in my throat as I digested what I was reading.

I, Ellie Johnstone, had been dumped.

The perpetrator of the brutal dumping had done it out of the blue by email, while he was at work, knowing full well I couldn’t call him to make a scene. And I would make a scene.

Feeling slightly dizzy, I re-read the message that had just, quite frankly, ruined my afternoon.
How could he? I know we didn’t have the most conventional of relationships, but I was so in love with him I didn’t care that we’d been seeing each other six months and never actually slept together. We’d got close to it once, and when he said he wanted to take it slowly, I thought it was cute – when I’d got over the humiliation of being rejected, obviously – but after a while it just got…tedious. Our relationship seemed to consist of me feeling let down and a bit frustrated because of the numerous ways I’d try to engineer getting him alone in my flat, and the numerous excuses he came up with for not being able to come in.  I blamed myself.

He blamed Rachel, his ex.

She was beautiful. I’d seen the pictures he still kept in his wallet. She had fallen out of love with him after being married for five years, except she’d neglected to tell him.  He only found out when he’d discovered the text messages she’d been sending to her lover. Who also happened to be his brother. I made every excuse for his lack of interest in me physically, but deep down, I started to believe it was because I was a big girl and Rachel was younger, more glamorous and much slimmer than me.

I hated that he made me feel like that.

When we met, he’d said that he loved the fact I was confident about my body even though I was a size 20, but after months of going out with a man who quite obviously didn’t fancy me, my confidence was in shreds and I was having to stretch my own body-positive credibility to believe I was the sexy, voluptuous beauty I kept trying to tell myself I was.

I’d needed three very large glasses of Pinot Grigio to get me back to the bedroom with Mark that disastrous night. I’d been so nervous – he was the first person I’d got close to since I’d split from my ex-husband and I hadn’t exactly been around the block. In fact, you could count all the men I’d slept with on the fingers of one hand and still have fingers left over. Eventually, we ended up in my bedroom and just as things were about to get interesting, he sprung back like he’d just burned himself, shaking his head and muttering, “I can’t do this.”

He’d drunk too much to drive home, so he stayed the night, yet he couldn’t have slept further away from me if he’d been in the house next door. The next morning, he was out of the door at the first chirp of the dawn chorus. I pretended I was okay, but that kind of rejection? It stung. Convinced I was about to be dumped right there and then, I was straight on the phone to Zoë, as soon as it was sociable, bawling my eyes out. Only Zoë and Lauren, my two closest friends, knew that Mark and I had a celibate relationship.

Everyone else thought we were a lovely couple, they even commented on it. ‘You two are so lovely’ and do you know what? That was fine by me. I gave them the smug smile and let them think we were loves not-so-young dream. I thought he might be coming round to the idea of a ‘normal’ relationship, and by normal, I mean a relationship involving sex, really good sex, when he suggested we get tickets for Glastonbury in the summer – but now here I was, dumped, miserable and stuck with two tickets to the festival I wasn’t even that fussed about going to. I had bought them as a surprise birthday present for him, because that’s what ‘cool’ girlfriends do.

There’s nothing like being dumped to kill your ability to write.

My work for a beauty website may sound terribly glamorous, but being ‘Spa Editor’ for Glammazon sounds far more fabulous than it actually was. I did get sent on the occasional visit to a new spa or salon opening, or to try out a brand-new treatment, which definitely counted as a major perk, but most of the time I sat at home in my little flat, typing out pages and pages of dull copy for a website that was desperate to get to the top of the Google rankings, even if it made the content itself virtually unreadable.

I still hadn’t replied to Mark’s email.
Usually I’d be the first person to come up with something clever to say, but I was literally lost for words, which for a writer, is not a good sign. I kicked myself for suggesting a weekend in Dublin, because that’s what normal couples do, and we weren’t normal, were we? We were technically just a couple of mates who hung out, and I was his freaking agony aunt, listening to him whine on and on about his cheating bitch of an ex, her personality disorders and how much he hated his brother for sleeping with his wife.
I did start to write a reply, but when the words wouldn’t come, I simply typed, “Whatever. Have a nice life.” and hit send.
Muttering the word ‘arsehole’ under my breath, I logged onto my Facebook account, changed my status to ‘single’ and added, “Don’t ask. Just send chocolate.”

So I was single. Again.”
Buy Viva Voluptuous here.

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Resolutions? Sod that. Happy 2014!

book2014

I was going to post something about plans for 2014, but you know what? Nah.

I don’t make resolutions any more. There’s no point. I’m still the same person on 1st January as I was on 31st December. As I don’t do the diet thing any more, there’s no ceremonial throwing out of the Christmas stash, which is just as well as I was a lucky girl and managed to get about 2.5 kilos of chocolate given to me at Christmas, which even with my legendary chocolate demolishing abilities would be hard to eat in the space of a week.

I have been thinking that I want to do more with this blog mind you. I think that because my tell it how it is, warts and all posts went down so well, and in fact I got the book written off the back of them, people must like them, so I’ll do more of those. I also want to open the blog theme up a bit and not just write about the fat positive side of things, but embrace the positive in everything. It’s OK to be whoever and whatever you are, in my book. If you are happy and fat, all power to you. If you’re skinny – I love you too. If you’re anything in between, it’s all good. Just be happy, be positive, be the best YOU that you can, because gorgeous people, you will never ever be happy trying to be someone else.

I feel very positive about 2014. I know I’ve got some tough times ahead but I can deal with them. I’m getting married in a few days, I have plans for the blog, the business and another book, and with Moley on my side, I reckon it’s all going to work out just fine.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

(and a classic Abba tune for you)

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Filed under Bridezilla, General, Lifestyle

It’s that time of year…

…No,not another book plug.125x125-animated

Time for me to take stock and sit in front of my Amazing Biz and Life Workbooks and decide what the freaking hell I want to do with 2014.

I loved the 2013 Workbooks but I didn’t get around to filling them all in. Partly because I just didn’t get around to it, but also because they had to be printed out, and I’m never good at filling that stuff in. So imagine my squeals of delight when I found out that this years workbooks come in a cool downloadable PDF format that you can type directly into AND for those of you that want something pretty two write in, you can but them on Amazon too. Or you can print them off as usual and write on them in a pretty, glittery felt tip if that floats your boat.

I started with the LIFE workbook because that’s where I neglect things. I do the work and the bits before, after and between tend to get crowded out by deadlines. I also thought it was more fun to talk about that on the blog as a lot of the things I’ve looked back at about 2013 have been related to the Gorgeously Full Fat blog and book.

I’ve started by looking back at 2013, to say goodbye to it. I won’t actually be too sad to wave goodbye. I’m not one of those people who posts “Good riddance to a crap year” on Facebook, but Lordy, for my family, my friends and my bank account, this one’s been hard work. What has it taught me? well this is what I wrote in the workbook:

“Honesty works better than pretending to be someone I’m really not. People accept me as I am, I don’t have to pretend I’m happy when I’m sad, or that I care about things I don’t.

I can have an opinion that’s different to someone else’s and they will still like me.  If they don’t – it’s tough, and their problem.
I am way more resilient than I thought I was…”

I also wrote:

“I learned that I really need to start to take care of ME. Nobody else is responsible for my wellbeing.
I realised just how much I need ME time and often don’t get it.
I realised I don’t have to be perfect.
Honesty is really the way to go – in blogs, in books and in real life.”

Scary stuff, huh? But on the plus side:

What am I proud of?

  • Keeping it together when times have been really shitty.
  • Publishing the book
  • Never giving up, and trying to stay positive
  • Being able to help mum and dad out as much as possible, and feeling like I’m useful.
  • Organising a wedding single-handedly
  • Dealing with work/money problems and not letting them break me
  • Coming up with so many new ideas for things to do in work and life

The next step is starting work on what I want from 2014….I’m just going to leave it there for a day or so….

If you fancy doing this sort of thing too, but you think it might be pricey, don’t panic, you can get the whole lot for about £8 or they are £5 separately. Yep, really. Less than a couple of lattes. I’m damn well doing it this year, you watch me!

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Filed under Amazing Biz and Life Academy, Book Reviews

Amazing Academy…

Academy-125x250You know what really annoys me about business and money coaching programmes? I get loads of these things in my email and they sound so freaking tempting.

“Max your business potential!”

“Don’t miss out on a six-figure income”

These programmes are clearly targeted at people with a small-ish business, who want to move a step up. Fabulous. Trouble is, they are so bloody expensive! I got one through this afternoon, this entrepreneur tempted me onto her mailing list with a few freebies and has been sending me unmissable business coaching programme opportunities ever since. I decided to look at the link today and you want to know what she’s asking for her words of wisdom?

$997.

OK, in real money I make that £625.

I don’t have a spare £600-plus rattling around, honey, that’s why I need wealth coaching! *big sigh*

That’s why I love the Amazing Biz and Life Academy, and why I’m going to be spending all afternoon catching up on my homework and checking out all the business and life-related chats I’m behind on. Sometimes, when I get seduced in by tempting offers to make zillions, with strap lines like, “Are you closing the door on your destiny” it’s easy to forget that I have a perfect, supportive and much less expensive resource to play with.

Leonie Dawson has created something that’s changing the lives and businesses of SO many women around the world in a way that’s never been seen before, and at the moment you can join the Academy for just $199. That’s £124, but you can pay it over three months if you haven’t got it all in one go. You get access to the FULL course up front as well, so no worries that you have to wait three months for it.

Mostly, I’ve been working on the business side of the Academy…which is what’s been spurring me on to develop the blog, write a book and a mini e-book and find new ways to grow my business too. I’ve added Power Reiki, I’m thinking about my next move for Gorgeously Full Fat (still under wraps until I’ve, well, um decided what to do) and I’m planning to qualify in EFT next year, by which time I’ll have another novel published.

I’ve found some amazing people – Leonie, Denise Duffield Thomas, Mary Joyce and Cara Wilde to name a few, Mary is helping me market and grow my business, and increase my blog, social media and mailing list numbers. Cara introduced me to EFT and I have some wonderful MP3s she’s given me. Denise is my go-to lady for anything money-related.

I haven’t used the Academy to anything like its full potential yet – I haven’t had the time to work on becoming a Radiant Goddess, developing my creativity or creating my little haven yet. It’s all there though. I have done some of the energy work and I still use some of the techniques Leonie teaches now.

There’s also a generous affiliate scheme which I have mentioned being a part of before, which makes it easy to make your money back from commission payments.

BusinessGoddess-200x200So why am I mentioning all this now and not over on the website, chatting to like minded creative souls?

Well, a few people have asked me about the Academy and wanted to know more; and the prices are going up after this month. DOUBLE. It’s still a lot more affordable than pie in the sky wealth creation courses that probably just create wealth for the people that run them, but it’s not going to be £124 for long. I think, also, that if you join now, you get to renew at the price you joined after a year if you like it.

It’s not magic, you get out what you put in but the tools, support and resources are all pretty fabulous.

Right, I had better get back over there, I’m looking for some more ideas about how to actually make a bit of money that don’t include begging for copy writing work…you’ll thank me one day, I promise!

 

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Freebie!

freebieI’ve signed up for a social media ‘Grow Your Tribe’ programme which is designed to get loads of people hanging on my every word by the end of September. I’ve set myself some ambitious targets for the challenge, so it’s probably just as well I’m not overwhelmed with masses of work at the moment!

So, I apologise in advance for inviting you to like things, follow things and generally click lots of buttons on social media sites. It’s that Mary Joyce. She told me to do it. But it’s all for my own good.

To get things started, I’m offering a little freebie. If you have a blog, or a GoodReads account, you can have a free PDF copy of Gorgeously Full Fat. All you need to do is:

Review the book on your blog, GoodReads and/or Amazon.

Follow this blog.

Follow me on Facebook and Twitter.

Easy huh?

If that all seems like a bit too much work, of course you can always just buy it…

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Filed under Book Reviews, Gorgeously Full Fat book, My weight story

Proud Mama

Red-Haired Woman LaughingWell I did it! I actually did it! I finally worked out how to use the Kindle Publishing software (after a LOT of swearing) and got my book uploaded. So it’s there. Oh. My. God. Here’s the blurb:

“Back in 1987, when Margaret Thatcher was still in charge, the Pet Shop Boys were number one, and I was just 16, I went on my very first diet. This is the story of how I got sucked into the diet trap, and how long it took me to escape its clutches.

With the help of some other diet escapees, Gorgeously Full Fat looks at how the media, fashion magazines and just wanting to fit in keep people like me trapped in diets that don’t work, and then, what it’s like dating as a thirty-something chubby girl.

There’s also some wise and rather fabulous advice from people who’ve been there, done that and got the T-shirt in more than one size on life after dieting.

Live like you love yourself!”

And here’s the link if you like the sound of it: http://www.amazon.co.uk/Gorgeously-Full-Fat-yourself-ebook/dp/B00EPHX54C

I can’t believe I did it. I was a bit scared about putting so much of me and my life out there, but it’s all done in a super-positive and upbeat way, even when I’m talking about being dumped, divorced or binge eating pork pies. There’s lots of stuff in there I hope that anyone who’s been on and off diets will relate to – talking about diet clubs, different types of book, the way we feel (not just me) when we go on a diet and it’s all new and exciting.

There’s a section at the end, after my disastrous diet stories and tales of dates with complete Muppets (and my beloved Moley) that features words of wisdom from people who have ditched diets, talking about how they did it and how it feels to be free. There’s also sections on people-pleasing and fat talk, two of the worst things ever if you’re trying to heal your addiction to weight loss.

There’s a section of links to books, blogs, websites and even Twitter and Pinterest pages full of inspirational images, advice and general loveliness.

So it’s not ALL about me.

It’s out there, I gave birth to my book baby. I’m an author-girl. I think I need to lie down…

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Filed under Media, My weight story